For some, its a gift that comes rather naturally but for others romance is a act by which we continually need to be conscious and thoughtful of. Gifts, hugs, a note to say ‘I love you’ are small acts of kindness that are just the beginning of true romance.
In the course of life we sometimes forget those who are nearest and dearest to us. Perhaps the ‘honeymoon’ phase is over within a relationship and daily activities takeover an idealized life. Its true, romance takes time, it takes risk and it takes a daring heart. Encourage yourself to leap off the cliff and take on the challenge. Being truly romantic involves opening yourself up and revealing your feelings to someone else. Its a risk but if taken seriously, its a risk worth taking.
While romance is often associated with a partner, boyfriend, girlfriend or spouse, I believe that romance, the act of giving and sharing love should not be kept for when ‘in a relationship‘ only. What better practice than to shower your parents, sister, brother or friends with love and adoration is little ways?
Thoughts to remember when considering romance:
- How is more important than why.
- ‘Good chemistry’ has nothing to do with compatibility.
- The process of romance must be respected. There’s not shortcuts! If some form of romance is not on your to-do list, you may want to reevaluate your priorities.
- ‘Communication’ is 10 percent of an A+ relationship. Creating a loving, long-term relationship is the most difficult, time-consuming, and complicated challenge you will face in your entire life. Also the most rewarding!
Add a little romance to your life:
1. Say ‘I love you’ at least once a day.
2. No need for fancy dinners to pull out the candles. Why not share takeout by candlelight?
3. Write a little note – pop it in the book he/she is reading.
4. Write a letter sharing how grateful you are to have him/her in your life. Send via snail mail for a simple surprise.
5. Finding yourself always forgetful of anniversaries or special dates such as Mother’s day? Place a standing order with your local florist and provide the dates for flowers to be sent out. Have the florist charge your card and bill you automatically. This technique is for the forever-forgetful and terminally organised!
6. Always stay in touch with the special, memorable, unique ways that the two of you have had fun together. What is your fondest memory with him/her? Why not, do it again!
7. Learn his/her ‘blind spots’ and encourage him/her in those areas.
8. Learn hi/her ‘soft spots’ and indulge in them.
9. Understand the difference between a gift and a present. A present is something that you’re giving the receiver because its something you want him/her to have. In contrast, a gift is something that you’re sure the receiver wants. What has he/she wanted for a really long time but held back from buying? Now is your opportunity!
10. Learn his/her all-time fravourite meal and learn how to create it! Get help from friends, family or neighbours – whatever it takes!
11. Hold a ‘romance idea brainstorming session’. Create a list of ideas and activities for the next month or so.
12. Do you take your partner/friend for granted? It’s time to stop! Take time to show that you appreciate their strengths and how their life has impacted yours in a positive way.
13. When was the last time the two of you simply went for a walk together? Not only is this a great opportunity to spend some one-on-one time together but it also has added health benefits!
14. Compliment him/her in front of friends and family.
15. Open doors for her with an extra little flourish.
16. Surprise him/her by giving him/her a gift on your birthday!
17. Do you know your partner well? Memorize their fravourite colour, flower, author, Bible passage, song, meal, ice-cream flavour, restaurant, artist, style of artwork, role model.
18. Why not… cook a meal together?
19. Sit down at the beginning of each month and discuss romantic plans that will fit into other scheduled appointments and commitments.
20. Remember: occasional romance is nice but its limited. Romance that spans over time is what its really all about. Why? Simply because consistency of romantic efforts reflect your commitment to your partner. It shows that he or she is top priority in your life.
21. Why not…shake up your routine. Changing your routine often leads to new ideas and a fresh perspective.
22. Think different: Always late? Be on-time!
23. Complete that chore or favor that your partner has wanted you to do for a long time.
24. Wear your favourite perfume to bed – even if you sleep alone! Or tuck dried lavender inside of pillow cases before using them for a fragrant surprise.
25. Understand that the disagreements are an integral part of the plot. Respect the other individual’s wishes/desires/believes. Never be too proud to not listen to the other side of the story.
26. Light candles when you arrive home, rather than turning on all the lights in the house.
27. Listen to relaxing music rather than turning on the television.
28. Keep fresh flowers by your nightstand.
29. Switch off the electronic equipment such as iPads/laptops/computers and enjoy a relaxing evening with a book.
30. Take a cooking class together. Learn how to perfect your fravourite dish.